Bloody frustrated

You know what, people? Yesterday I was just telling my Gran about me wanting to pick up violin if I had the chance and this was what I get today, all of a sudden that she's just blurted that damned thing out.

Her: You better buy that violin and then you won't use it anymore. Your dad can't afford everything that you may want.

Me: Did I say that I wanna use your money at any extend? I know what I am doing and I didn't say that I want to learn it right now, did I?

(Alex, the inner me: It was just a bloody plan! Say I wanna buy a palace or learn cello. Is it a compulsory act that I must buy them? Don't your son has weird wishes too? He's worse than me, alright?! At least I don't take things that are not mine! I earn what I do!)

Her: That's the only thing that you know how to say nowadays. How are you gonna get all that money?

Me: I'll do it when I have it. It's not a haste that I WANT violin so badly now!

(Alex: OK, so you're implying that I can't even have my own damned dreams too is it? Why on earth is everyone stopping my dreams?! Mom on the other hand keeps on telling Gran that she couldn't help a single bit due to her financial problems and stuffs. PEOPLE WAKE UP! I don't need your sympathy to survive. I am well off on my own feet and have I really asked you for money before, Mom? Even if I do, I paid you back, remember? In fact, I have never talked anything about money to you, or to Gran, or to anyone in the damned world. I know I am living in reality! I'm so damned fed up of this idea whereby you all think that I really need your money to buy my stuffs. Look, it's Dad's and Gran's must to nurture me and stuffs. It is their responsibility! But otherwise, I bought a new guitar with my own money. I know when to spend and when to safe, people. Damn it. Everyone of my family should just read this)

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The moral of the story is, I will never ever tell whoever in my family about any of my plans any-damned-more. If any of them ever blames me for this, I'm just going to tell them, "Besides criticizing my actions, any other suggestions you have? You didn't even listen to me, remember?"

That's it. Mom, I know you're reading this. And I am still mad at the whole ideology that I NEED everyone's money to survive. Money's such a damned spoiler. Call me as soon as you read this! Get me thinking rationally about this damned brouhaha everyone in the family is making. Gahh!