To whom it may concern (and a small dream)

I'm losing hope towards that restaurant now. She's really super mean for giving us high hopes by asking and explaining so many things in a go. I'm just going  to give another 24 hours for them and for myself. If it fails, I'm through with this.

It's really so mean of them for doing this to us, you know? Explaining about the salary, asking when can we start working and wait for their call. Who they think they are? It's so... devastating that today's the first time that I am putting my phone on Loud mode whole day through, afraid that the lady might call any hour, any minute or any second. I was stupid enough to believe that we're getting hired soon.

***

Last night, I'd dreamt of Jacob Black on my bed, lying down with me. No sex intended. I really had my head spinning thinking about that and now I'm sort of... I dunno what I am feeling. I'm falling for a stupid movie character? How ironic! Perhaps I was thinking about Eclipse way too much before I sleep. Today I'm pacing forward the last of the saga: Breaking Dawn!

Alex, wake up! It's just a stupid dream. Gosh!

I have to admit there are many weird things happened these few days. The breach in connection between me and Mom, due to our busy lives. The breach in connection between me and Dad because I simply have nothing to say to him. The breach in connection between me and the world because I'm too much of my own. Worst still, the breach in connection between me and my soul.

I really dunno. Am I still sane? Many things have changed. I've moved on from a lot of things, that now I don't really seem to care of anything about those I've moved on from.

I'm already gone.


Now, I'll always bear in mind that I should not be too happy when something is too close but yet still far to reach. Yes, I'm taunting myself with my quote on the right panel: Isn't what is there, is there and what is not there, is there too?

I'm succumbing to my devastation. I'm giving up. For real. I'm sorry, guys.