NUFFY

Saturday, April 30, 2011

Hostel Day 1

Well, look, everybody!! I am still alive. HAHAHA! To be frank, the hostel isn't bad at all!! It's just that I do not have a room mate yet. This makes it very dull inside. Time is creeping here. Unlike in Seremban, time flies!!

It was 7am when I woke up today and I prepared myself all the way till 8.20am, where my taxi fetched me. I was rather bored throughout the journey, but Uncle Tan (the driver) played Teressa Teng's songs in his car. So, it was considered a good way to spend time while looking at the panorama. I finished a chapter in Wuthering Heights too but I was too bored to continue reading. Within an hour or so, I reached the hostel. Did my cleaning, unpacking and arranging. It was already 11am and I took my shower (water was as cold and refreshing as waterfall!!!!! I doubt the occupants bathe in the morning). I went to the hostel cafeteria and had my brunch and went back to my room to sleep, around 12pm and when I woke up, the time was 2.30pm. DAMN the time is very slow, I thought.

The rest of the tortoise-paced time went on with guitar, internet, food and baths. Oh, I did a little stroll today too, just to waste time. I can't wash clothes until tomorrow because I am only going to buy detergent tomorrow after breakfast with Mom and Sis. Lovely, isn't it?

While I was having my muffin for tea time (before I went for my walk), I was approached by 2 Christian youths, whom I believe they are introducing their church to me. It is protestant. They have invited me for their mass tomorrow but I couldn't go. It's still OK, every Sunday is Sabbath Day. So, why worry?

Folks, that's the end of my day today.

Supplicanti parce, Deus.

Friday, April 29, 2011

Hostel check-in

I could not sleep the whole night and took thirty winks from 4 in the morning till 5.
Had breakfast, bathed. Waited for bus. Saw my neighbour going for mass, and my neighbour's friend who was fetching her agreed to drop me at the train station.

Accidentally sat on an express train. Well, I've asked the workers there, is this train heading to Central KL and they said, "yes". Then, at about half hour after that, there was this rather handsome KTM officer checking the passenger tickets and all of them were showing white pieces of papers and I turned white, when he came to me, I shyly handed my red ticket to him and hoping not to be surcharged. Upon checking, he just handed it over to me and proceeded. PHEW!

By 8.40am, I have reached Central KL. Then I took LRT to Taman Melati and walked all the way to the college hostel. THAT WAS A TIRING JOURNEY! It was 9.30am when I stepped into the hostel office. The guy who helped me with my check in was pretty cute. Hehe! Got my room and MAN! My place was as dusty as hell. Gracious. It was... very bad that my sinusitis came up on the spot. I could only sleep for half an hour.

After all the proper things I have done, I took train all the way back to my home town and took bus from Seremban to my house. However, in the bus there was this Chinese man continually provoking an Indian youngster, at about my age, I would bet. There were a few curses from these two people at the back of the bus and some looked, some couldn't be bothered. However when the Chinese man was going down the bus, he provoked the youngster again with curses, challenging him to beat him up, and guess what? The youngster got up and bashed him. Two other Indian ladies were shouting from the bus asking him to stop beating that guy up. These two turned deaf ears against them and finally the bus driver had to stop that fight from getting worse. That was all from there.

Well, I suppose, that is all I could tell here. Is there anything else?

Supplicanti parce, Deus.

PS: I did a psychoanalysis on that man, which I strongly believe he must have had some mental illness or he was really depressed about many things. Otherwise, no human in their right mind would provoke someone continually to get beaten by someone, right?

Thursday, April 28, 2011

Love? Marriage? Commitments?

We always hear people say, "Don't leave me. I love you. I cannot live without you!" To me, and some other people whom I talked to about this issue, they say it's just crap.

Puppy lovers only have 2 things in mind. First is lust. Lust or desire of having someone to accompany them. Desire and mere sense of belonging. The end. In this aspect, they tend to hog around each other, mush around and do many cute things together. TOGETHER. That's all they want. They have nothing to worry.

Now, on the second aspect which I believe this is very much healthier than Lust, is mental support. This would be obvious when one says, "I seriously need you now. Where the fuck are you???!!!" This is usually uttered by the girl to the boy. Pardon me for not using the term woman and man, because it's puppy love, remember? It is so simple for them both. This cute puppy couples. Their lives are mainly about their lives. Their worlds. Their co-joined world. Their simple society.

This time, they somehow believe the boy cannot show their sadness or ask their "girlfriends" to comfort them. Just like the men depicted in the story, "Looking for a Rain God". The traditional culture and community somehow... sets a status quo which until now: female humans being the weak ones and always break down and the male humans being the strong ones and always give mental support to their families and cannot break down in front of them. If this statquo (I portmanteau status quo, mind you) has been changed. What people think is going to be, "Wow. This lady is a very strong woman. Meh, this guy is such a weak man, shame on him!"

Here comes the interesting part of my post. Marriage (let's not talk about this yet), or I should make an antonym out of puppy lovers - Adult lovers, or true lovers. Matured lovers. They have many things in mind that Lust and Mental Support alone will never help to sustain their relationships. Things would get very hard for them. Complex community in complex environment. Now, the psychology of adult lovers are far more interesting than that of puppy lovers.

They would look on more than those two aspects, namely: Family background, wealth, academic qualification and the list goes on. Well just refer to the picture and you will understand what I mean. Mental support isn't so very essential anymore. Religious afflictions too. This just shows that when it comes to marriage (and adult lovers, of course), it is material over mind and mind over matter. Things change. When they fail to sustain this relation, say the family goes bankrupt or what not, some are lucky enough to have their wives giving a lot of mental support to them but there are a lot of them just utter the magic word and poof! Everything is gone. Divorce.

There are cases where these couples can be saved but there are more cases where these couples cannot be saved from the desire to divorce. Well, if such is the case, why bother committing themselves into marriages at the first place? Life isn't all beds of roses, I would say. So much to say for semper fidelis?

Supplicanti parce, Deus.

Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Broken

Yeah, I am a little heartbroken. My friend who is supposed to be studying in the college I am going to, couldn't make it. He was a little late by one mini step, which is applying for hostel. Right now, he has two problems: overdue payment and no shelter. Thus, he jumped into a painful conclusion by going to other colleges, or perhaps, to Form 6. These are his 2 options left. Yesterday, both of us were rather sad because so much hope for being together and stuffs, then this problem came up. Sigh, such is life...

Anyhow, I'd still wanna thank Mom for this one. She was the sole person pestering me almost every day since the college visit and finally, my senses came back to me and voila - I acted very much quicker than I expect myself would. So, let's just hope that I will have a nice Mr. Mystery as my room mate when I check-in on the 29th. Just a few more days. Shopping is all done. Bag-packing is all done; well 90% done. Intelligence of doing laundry has been attained; of course Granny was my tutor and we did quarrel a little because of different styles and what not. Well, I think that is about all? Hope so!

To my friend;
If you read this, well I just hope you'd continue with your studies, wherever you are going to do it. It is for your own good, as you told me last night. Take care, man. I will miss you.

Supplicanti parce, Deus.

Saturday, April 23, 2011

Visits

On my latest visits to a few blogs I follow, I have just noticed that everything is not what it is meant to be anymore. Most of them changed. I have lost contact with all of them. You see, it wasn't the old time where I sleep at 12am and wake up groggily on 5.45am the next day and get ready, wait for bus. Go to school. Read book. Go out of the class. Read book. Come back to class. Lessons. Recess. Lessons. Go home. Revise... Well, you sure get what I mean now.

This afternoon, Aruna and I were messaging each other (which is something really odd for the both of us to do because we VERY VERY RARELY, approaching NEVER, messaged each other a lot before) and she has just realised how freaking fast time flies by. Well, it is true. I'll  be leaving for college on 30th April. Jason's leaving for college next Saturday. On the other hand, I have no clue what has happened to the rest of the gang. Sorry for my ignorance, people.

To be frank, I would not blame them for hating my ignorance because most of the time, LAST TIME... We somehow have gone out too much too often that now, it's been clichéd in my life already. I've skipped A LOT of their meetings recently - since the third week of March, that is. That is about a month ago. Now, I don't like talking to them. It is not that I hate them or whatsoever, I just find it so weird to just pop out one day and send "Hi" to them on Facebook or chats. Surely they would have something uneasy to say, when I say I miss them. An expected reply: "That's why. Dah ajak banyak kali, tak nak keluar."
"We've invited you a lot of times but you insisted of not coming with us."

Any extra-terrestrial updates from me? Well, yes.
1. I am signing up to be an official advice columnist in Tumblr (I will inform when I already HAVE a page for myself).
2. My granny and I argue more frequently. Which of course, is never a good thing. Well, I can't blame any of us. She, being far worse than self-righteous and persistent that almost everything she says boils my blood. Me, being the Opposition to whatever she has to say by bringing up proofs of her wrongs and what I do is not wrong... This somehow tends to make things worse. I often told myself, "Patience, Alex. Just a few more days."
3. I am not on talking terms with Dad due to some reasons which I do not wish to tell here. Things between us somehow... I mean the bond between us, is getting weaker and weaker. Blame me. Blame him? Whatever. Mom, if you read this, just pretend you didn't. I don't wanna tell you either, because if I do wanna tell you, I should just write it here too, shouldn't I?
4. Guitar is getting harder now. (I am currently in love with Etude No. 2 in E minor by F. Tarrega. A piece in my Yamaha book) I've mentioned this before. Now I am going to mention it again. It just gets far more complex now, than before. However, thanks to Tommy and Mr. William my sight-reading has improved.

Supplicanti parce, Deus.

Sunday, April 17, 2011

OWL

Second time this year, I stayed up the whole day (and night) doing nothing. I could not sleep. Perhaps it was the machiato last night. Epic feeling. I think the morning breeze somehow freshens me up, in a way. Although my eyes are rather tired...

There is a reason behind the maciato that I drank last night. I went out with my friend and we were talking the whole night (well, not really... just for about 2 hours) about philosophies, exchanging ideas, debating facts in a cafe until my machiato turned cold on my last gulp.

Effect?


1. I could not sleep.
2. Tummy is making funny noises.
3. I am going to look like an owl today.

However, the pain worths it, for me.

Supplicanti parce, Deus.

Thursday, April 14, 2011

Books (Part 2)

I am planning to read "The Gift" in the month of December because this book has so very much Chrismas spirit in them!

The Book of Tomorrow? Well, I need to wait for my dad to come back home to give it to me. Let's see what books can I read.

Well, one thing for sure is: Romeo and Samson, no doubt. Ha, ha! That was a parody that Keevin, Gloria (if I was not wrong. Or it could be Zura too, on the way back from the Sunway trip. I can't really remember) and I talked about when we were talking about homosexuals. I meant Romeo and Juliet, people.

Wuthering Heights? Frankenstein? Robinson Crusoe? The Phantom of the Opera? Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde?
DAMN! There is just too many classic books up for grabs and it is only less than RM10 per book!!! Unlike those modern books which I'd rather ask Dad to buy for me in the UK.

Well, maybe I will just buy the combo pack in MPH that has Wuthering Heights and Robinson Crusoe for about RM17 odds, if I remembered correctly. Frankenstein? I think I will append that one.
Supplicanti parce, Deus.

I am not the only one to think of this



Supplicanti parce, Deus.

Tuesday, April 12, 2011

Bliss in Disguise

After yesterday's horrible rants to the neighbours, I finally see changes. They no longer park the way they used to park anymore. Should this be good, in a way?
Supplicanti parce, Deus.

Monday, April 11, 2011

Wasted minutes

Some people say, being angry for a minute, you lose 60 seconds of happiness, and I today, lost 6 000 seconds of happiness and contentment. 10 minutes of anger.

I was very hungry and I wanted to buy dinner. However, my neighbours parked their cars on the narrow street and I could not drive out of my house at all. People say, "Hungry man is an angry man," well... That's true in my case. I was angry not only because I was hungry, but I have been tolerating with all of them for a long time already, since I've bought this car, since they've bought new cars, since they've bought bigger cars.

What I did tonight was, reader... I drove up to my house pavement, smashed the door shut, locked my car door and started shouting to Granny (complaining to her, that was) about how relentless these people in the neighbourhood are! That moment, as I've thought over it now, was the premiere time where I have told my neighbours off sarcastically with my loud booming voice, which I was sure these car owners that scatter their cars and made it hard for me to drive, heard it.
Question: Did they understand my flare?
For 10 minutes, or so (which I was sure, my flare was not finished within 10 minutes) I was continuously cursing them being ignorant, stupid, idiotic and bloody. Readers, I could be the youngest driver in my street but... I seriously do not know what should I say.

My friends advised me to talk to them. But why? 4 cars, readers. Not one. How is it for me to talk to these people? Wouldn't they think bad of me? I just am afraid to tell them to move their cars, particularly because I did not wanna disturb their family so late a night. Now, I am all but remorseful over the actions that I've done. I've wasted my time and now my car remote control is out of order (because I threw it full forced to the floor as I was shaking with fury).

However, on this accord, I shall never say sorry to these people. In fact, everyone including me should be grateful that nothing worse than noise pollution for a few minutes happened tonight. Otherwise, things could be far worse off.

Dad and Mom, I am sorry that I could not contend this within myself, as I have been tolerating with them a long while. I am sincerely sorry again.

Supplicanti parce, Deus.

PS: I was so near of uttering these words -
"I am simply too intelligent to stay here with these people," which by no means, would be very unpleasant to hear, because one thing of me - I am sick of the citizen's civil conscience to the core already. Seeing these things, simply make me far more ill of the ugly status quo.

PPS: I am sorry that my English has been taken into another level of metaphor and simile. Written, especially. As I am reading a lot of classic books recently (i.e.: Jane Eyre, A Midsummer Night's Dream, Macbeth and The Wonderful Wizard of Oz). Crossed are those that I've read.

Macbeth

One word: LOL!
Yes, I've finished the play but to my amusement, I found it funny. HAHAHA!!!
Supplicanti parce, Deus.

PS: I think I have had enough of writing short stuffs here. Well, I will do so in Tumblr. The updates are on the above buttons too!

Sunday, April 10, 2011

Books

I've finished A Midsummer Night's Dream already. Now, I'm heading to Macbeth.
Supplicanti parce, Deus.

PS: I think I should cut out Holy Bible and Koran first. Those are not books in my definition. Those are some sort of reference. Anyway, I hope I could read them both before I die... Hmmm...

Saturday, April 9, 2011

Of Bronte and Shakespeare

I've finished Jane Eyre this evening. The ending is rather bland but I'd have to give allowance to that. It was classics, people. However, I loved the falling action. SUPER BITTER AND TRAGIC where Jane's Master became crippled and stuffs. It was nice.

Now, I am going to read A Midsummer Night's Dream. I hope I can understand them. I'm positive.
Supplicanti parce, Deus.

Thursday, April 7, 2011

7th April 2011

This, I should say is indeed a final gathering to me, with my gang. We went for ice skating, which was really enjoyable. But the part I loved most was window shopping with Chew. It was really nice. I can't describe them but all I can say, it was fun. As all these while, Chew wasn't sticking to us as much because she is busy with work.

Even myself, I considered this the second outing, after I've changed - from the big spender to be the more practical person. 23rd March was the first outing with them and no more news from them. Pardon me when I say that. I didn't mean they didn't inform me. They did. But I just rejected all their outings since then, and they couldn't really accept the fact that I've changed. They didn't understand, either. Now not that I could care of.

I've happily deactivated my Facebook account due to a major reason which in fact I am not afraid of letting everyone to know: I don't wanna feel bad for skipping any of their so-called gatherings anymore. I just have had enough of nonsensical rhetoric remarks on every single excuse I gave. Enough said: I am bored of it. They are bored of it too. So, I've decided to put an end for this already. No Facebook simply means a better life for me.

I honestly think, had I joined the "other half" more often, (that's what I would call them, now that I know I was not alone thinking about this same issue, which quite balanced the group) I doubt I would turn out as who I am here. I even doubt if that was my true self. I have regretted doing a few things which are irreversible in life. Let's not just add another one in the list.

And to end, I also honestly think I suit my "other half" more. That is where I genuinely belong. The "understanding half".

Supplicanti parce, Deus.

PS: I am not imposing the "other half" as "not understanding half", please do not misjudge my point of view.
PPS: I've updated my "Things to do Before I Die" list. Be sure to check it out.

Tuesday, April 5, 2011

Cardiac arrest

I nearly died today, folks. I'M DEAD SERIOUS! This evening I called TARC to check on my hostel application and the lady told me that there is no such record of application with my name and the male residential area is already fully booked.

I went on to Plan E (E for emergency) by thinking of all sorts of things, what to buy, where to stay next (as I have saved 2 numbers in my phone) and Dad called me just in time. He could hear from my tone, although I was trying my best to stay calm. He knew I was panicked for something. So I went on discussing with him the things to buy and to bring etc.

Moments later, a buzz on my mobile. TARC, again.
"Hello, may I speak to - (my name) please?"
Speaking.
"This is Miss - here. Your hostel application is actually approved already," I swear I could hear her sheepish tone through the phone and I bet she was smiling rather sheepishly that particular moment as well. From the way she speaks, I am quite certain she is at her 20's. A small difference with me, I am certain.
OK, so meaning to say, I DO have a place to stay already, is it?
"Yes. My colleague was cross-checking on the name lists of those KIV ones, that is why we couldn't find your name in at first," or something of that sort, she was saying. I couldn't remember as much.
OK, so may I check in on the 2nd May?
... (and the conversation went on and she gave me the Hostel Dept number to ask further questions, as it is beyond their (Student Affair Dept's) knowledge)

AMEN! GOOD LORD! I nearly collapsed when I first heard the news, now that she said it's been approved. I am very much more relieved.
Supplicanti parce, Deus.

Monday, April 4, 2011

How are you?

I'm fine.

I'm sorry for being 'away' these few days, as I have nothing to write about. My latest progress in guitar is Capricho Arabe. I am learning this piece by myself. I didn't really dare to ask my teacher to teach me yet. The Sounds of Bells which I played few weeks ago was indeed a motivation for me. This piece, I reckon is also of Grade 7.

Other than that business, my college payments have been cleared. My choral speaking team, I've done my part. So, winning or losing is no longer anything of my concern now. My debate team, they lost on the quarter final. Too bad. I could somehow see it already, with their current strength. I just kept my mouth shut.

Last night, I went out with my friends whom I have not seen for years. Planned to go to Next Online Cafe but ended up in Beevi instead. But never mind, it was good. Although I've forgotten 2 of them and they still remembered me. It was actually impromptu. I was ACTUALLY asking ONE out only, but he went call the other 2 out. It ended well, though. They were nice people, or so that I can see.

Today, woke up half hour later than expected. I think it was because of my evening walk yesterday. It was a tiresome walk and I witnessed a post-accident. I only knew the story from an old man that a car driving too fast and ended down in the valley. One motorcyclist was slightly injured while another one was rushed to hospital. I was wondering why on earth were they looking at the car in the valley for so long. Really typical of them. Forget it.

I doubt if there is anything else for the moment.
Supplicanti parce, Deus.